Race, race, race
No end in sight
Over analyzing
Over thinking
Confused—
Don’t know what
To feel, to say
To be
I just am.
Lost in a sea
Of thought
Of time
Of longing
Regret – no
Dismay – yes
Something is broken
I just don’t know
What it is
The hands on the clock
The beat of a heart?
No – none of these
But what?
I question
I find no answers
And I yearn for them
I want them
Though I wait
Nothing seems to come
I suppose a longer time
Must have to pass
Before I understand
But what must I
Undergo in this time?
Can my heart take it?
Yes, my heart is strong
My love even more
I just feel changes
And I know it’s
Just a valley
But right now
It seems so deep
Locked in winter
Locked in sleep.
What pains me most
Is the space between
The gap that lingers
On this long road
I just don’t understand
I don’t want
To be second
Though I don’t always
Need to be first
Why this conundrum?
Why these thoughts?
I never second guess
Nor do I now –
But I wonder
Why the space
That seems to linger?
I feel an absence
I don’t know
As to why
But it lingers
Nonetheless
In those few gentle moments
It doesn’t matter much
But in others
It feels so deep.
Maybe I feel too much
Maybe I am wrong
As so often
I seem to find myself,
But perhaps,
No – wrong
Waiting is the answer
Waiting is the key
I must wait
What else can I do?
So steadfast my heart
Beat gently
Beat slowly
Beat deeply
Hold to the precious
Few moments
And live through the space
Keep busy
Beep quiet
Hold true to your course
You know where it leads
And this
Among all things
Shall pass –
